Victor and Samuel were not only brothers but best friends; they did everything together. Samuel was a couple years younger then Victor but Victor always let Samuel tag along with his friends on the weekends.
However, this mostly consisted of getting in trouble.
Victor and Samuel had fallen into the wrong crowd in high school and now spent their spare time engaging in illegal activities.
One Saturday afternoon Victor decided it would be a fun prank to break into their high school and steal the school statue in the front hall! Samuel, being the younger and more naive bother, always did what his brother said.
Victor and Samuel, along with a couple of Victor's friends, arrived at their high school at eleven o'clock that night. Victor, who had this prank planned for a while now, had stolen a key from the janitors cart that friday. Samuel would be in charge of carrying the keys that night.
The boys entered the high school, walking quietly through the halls in the case that someone was there. Once it seemed safe, they headed towards the front hall. Victor skipped down the halls with his friends, obviously very proud of himself for his idea. Samuel walked quickly and cautiously behind them.
The statue, which was a replica of their school mascot, was small enough for Victor to carry on his own. Right as he lifted it up, a voice came from down the hall.
"Hey! What do you think you're doing?"
The boys bolted down the hall. Victor ran behind the rest of the boys, statue in hand.
Suddenly, someone grabbed Victor by his shirt collar, jerking him backwards. He squealed and the statue flew out of his arms and shattered on the floor.
The other boys, including Samuel, turned their heads around but never stopped running.
They reached the front door and bursted outside.
"We have to lock the door behind us so they never know how we got in!"
Samuel hesitantly locked the door behind him and they ran to the car. He felt guilty for leaving his brother but was too scared to go back.
The boys decided to drive to the back of the parking lot and wait to see what happened to Victor. Eventually, Victor came marching out of the school, head held high. He had made up some extravagant story and persuaded the security guard to let him go.
Victor walked up to the car and climbed in. His pride turned to anger and it was directed at Samuel. Immediately, Victor punched Samuel in the face...over and over. He blamed Samuel for everything and told him he would never be allowed to hang out with him and his friends ever again.
Photo: Google Images
Author's note:I did my story based on Vali and Sugriva's past. Vali was fighting a demon and chased him into a cave. Sugriva, trying to help, closed the cave the behind them. Vali came out enraged at Sugriva and attacked him then sent him into exile.
Narayan, R. K. (1972) The Ramayana.
Wow what a story! I really enjoyed reading the whole story I like how you used the high school theme and s brother fight. I felt like I could understand the original story better through your version of the high school drama. I didn't like the ending of the brothers though what did you think? I wish both the brothers were affectionate instead of fighting.
ReplyDeleteAt first I thought the brothers you were channeling in your story was Rama and Lakshmana but I quickly realized it was not them! I really like how you based your story in a different environment and held onto the essence of the story of Vali and Sugreeva. I had not read a story yet told in this way but I think you did an awesome job!
ReplyDeleteThis was a very creative retelling of Vali and Sugreeva (I picked up on the first-letter parallels in the names, a good idea). I like how you completely modernized the story and put it in everyday terms, but still kept the core features of the original. In this version, though, there were some important changes (besdies the modernizing). Like, in the story Vali goes to defend his people from a demon, but here he was doing something wrong to begin with - in my opinion, this changes how I feel about Vali/Victor's actions. Did you do this on purpose, or was it a byproduct of coming up with a more modern version? And how do you think it changes the message of the narrative?
ReplyDeleteThis was so creative! I love how you used a modern day style for retelling the story, but still had your characters' actions parallel those of Vali and Sugreeva. For some reason I felt like Sugreeva was much more justified in his actions than Samuel was. Samuel should not have left his brother behind. I still thought it was sad when Victor basically banished his brother from associating him anymore. It seems to me that the bond between brothers should be much stronger than the one shown in this story.
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job modernizing an ancient tale in this story! The parallels you drew were interesting, and helped to maintain the essence of the original. However, I also wondered about why you made the act that the two brothers were committing one that was immoral, rather than moral as in "The Ramayana." Is this because you didn't agree with Vali's behavior in the epic? Or was this modern situation simply a better fit with the other aspects of the tale?
ReplyDeleteIn any case, fantastic job!